"and all you see...is where else you could be, when you're at home"

About a month ago I had one of those pure moments of clarity, where you see yourself as if from the outside. I was walking home after working at Farm Girl Farm. It's a CSA (community supported agriculture) about 2 blocks from my house. Every Wednesday evening I go to the farm and work for about 2 hours in exchange for food. It's been a great experience for me. One, because it gives me a reason to be outside working. And Two, I get the perfect amount of fresh, organic vegetables. So this day, I was walking along Route 71 eating freshly picked green beans, the sky was clear with just a few scattered white clouds, and there was a nice breeze keeping things comfortable. A small plane flew over head, readying to land at the nearby "airport", and as I listened to the sound of the propellers, I realized how magical a place this is. But, the way in which my mind formulated that thought was to think "I'm really going to miss these things". I was suddenly struck by how absurd it is to constantly live my life missing the places I've been, and looking forward to the places I will be.. yet never being satisfied where I am. In realizing that, I've found myself at peace with where I am in the world. Not just being in Great Barrington, but also with the things I'm doing. With the projects I'm working on, my job as a florist, my ideas and thoughts and plans. All of it. At this moment in time, I feel truly happy to be where I am. I'm not plotting my next move, and I'm not throwing down an anchor. I'm just here. And that's great.

That wasn't what I was planning on posting... I was going to do a post about my trip to Denver, but I think I'll hold off for now. For a sneak peek, check out this Photobooth series from my party while I was there.